MY way. {learning how to bend part 2}

I’m an education major, (yes, the smell of crayons makes me completely blissful) and I’ve always been really scholarly about my studies and successes in life. I’m the type of person who wants to know the instructions, does them precisely and expects to get an A+, after all I’ve done EXACTLY what I was told to do and in doing so I expect to be successful. I’ve always felt that working hard and *following the directions* always pays off in many aspects of life….that is until parenthood came along.

Remember when I told you I was a bag of worries in the beginning?

Well add to that the lack of *directions* or a step-by-step manual on “how to be a great parent and raise a wonderful baby “that I have been so accusomed to in all of my life. Let’s just say overwhelmed is an understatement.

Whenever I have a question, I’m used to researching it and finding an answer. Simple no? However, whenever I have a question regarding my little bundle of joy, I’ve become completely overwhelmed with not one answer but several, and in every situation there are TWO sides (most of which are completely opposite of the other) to every scenerio.

Whether it be: clothe diapers vs. disposable, formula vs. breast milk, letting baby cry it out (CIO) vs. the dangers of CIO, starting solids vs. exclusively breastfeeding, the benefits of co-sleeping vs. the dangers co-sleeping….the questions are endless and the answers are even more infinite and confusing (especially for a first time mommy liek me).

Needless to say, the girl who is so used to having a question, doing research, and finding AN ANSWER, has been on roller coaster of emotions lately all in effort to *do it right* and achieve that A+ that I’ve never ceased to achieve.

Though the points on each side of the spectrum regarding all of these concepts seem very valid and full of truth,..they still do not answer MY questions and I’ve started to realize that Sir Google and it’s endless amount of info from other parents via forums and message boards has led to fully believe that…

There is no ONE answer nor is there an *one size fits all* when it comes to babies and parenting.

What I have realized is that MY baby is different than that other baby….so my baby’s needs are different AND THAT’S OKAY. (I’m 100% guilty of being the comparision lady, always comparing this to that…that too must end.)

In the last couple of day’s I’ve realized that to be the best parent and have a happy baby I must just listen to my baby and respond according to how I see fit. So if my little guy is sleeping in our room because he refuses to sleep anywhere else then so be it. He’s sleeping, he’s happy and that’s all that really matters. (Plus, we all know that a happy baby makes everyone else happy. πŸ™‚ wouldn’t you agree?)

I also do know that I’m NOT going to be perfect. I’m going to make mistakes, plenty in fact, but I will also learn from them and be better because of it in the end.

So from the girl who is used to doing things a particular way, here’s to new challenges, a new mindset regarding those challeges and most importantly an incredible amount of rewards in return simply by just doing things MY WAY.

Lastly, society is so eager for babies to be so independent and sleep through the night, soothe themselves, not be dependent on mommy or daddy….but in such regards I feel that babies are only babies for a small amount of time, they soon grow up (all too fast) and they DO become independent…so until then I’m going to baby my baby as much as he needs it because before I know it he’ll be all grown up and I’ll be missing the days when all he needed was his mommy.

Until then, I’m off to cuddle with my little man, let him nap in the moby wrap instead of in his crib because he’s a baby and more importantly he is MY baby and that’s just how things are done around here.

P.s. if anyone has a problem with that….Aiden says..

…he WILL punch you!

{Little man @ 7 weeks old!}



*I am in no way intending to judge others who choose to do things differently. I respect their choices as I hope they would respect mine. I’m also not trying to bash anyone’s beliefs on parenting, I have just personally been under a cloud of sadness regarding the controversial sides of each of these aspects of parenting choices and have finally decided to let it go and live my life the way I see fit. Thank you! πŸ™‚





Filed under Baby Aiden, Parenthood

5 responses to “MY way. {learning how to bend part 2}

  1. Good for you! It’s good to do your research, and see the different size, but it’s extremely important that you do what works for you and baby. Don’t worry about Nancy around the corner who has her baby in another room, crying and yelling his lungs out. Don’t worry about Susie who gives her baby mashed potatoes at 2 months because she doesn’t think she needs to feed him every 2 hours, and wants to hold him over. Do what works for you and baby, be safe, and it’ll be fine. πŸ™‚
    No, I don’t have babies, but I have lots of little cousins I kept as babies. I even took a newborn baby home and took care of her for a few months when her mother was sick after childbirth. I know a little something. πŸ˜‰

    • Thank you so much! It’s great to know that others understand where I’m coming from. πŸ™‚ ❀ I really appreciate your words of encouragement. Hope you have a great day girl!

  2. Amanda

    Alicia, the internet is a cruel place for new mommies lol. There is too much information that contradicts itself. The best thing to do is what you feel is right in your heart and what makes you feel like you have succeeded. There will be times when you make a choice that may have been wrong at the time, but you learn from your mistakes. I can tell you that 3 years ago I was exactly like you, but now I have to do things the way that I think suit my child. You are doing great and always remember that we are only human and that we do make mistakes, so do not dwell on other’s information and just think about how you want to do things. Wish I was there to help. xoxoxoxo

    • Thanks doll! It’s super overwhelming and you know how sensitive I am. I do things then rethink if that was “the right thing” to do…but in all actually I just need to not question myself and be happy with my sweet little guy. Thanks for your post, I love getting feedback on the bloggy. Wish you were here too :-/ Come home soon! πŸ™‚ ❀ ❀

  3. Ginger

    Hmm….I didn’t have Internet when I had four of my own children, and I can tell you each one of them was so different from the other. What worked well with the first didn’t for the next or the 3rd or the 4th.
    Don’t fret the small stuff and remember there are NO perfect babies just like there are NO perfect parents!
    Hey just remember….you came out just fine – and you slept in our bed until you were around 4 years old! Lol! Xoxox Mom

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